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Around SBN: The Most Dangerous Division in Sports

'Twas the Night Before Clips-mas

With apologies to Henry Livingston, Jr or Clement Clarke Moore, here's our second annual Bright Side of the Sun "Night Before Christmas" as read through purple and orange glasses.  You can read last year's poem here.

Happy Holidays, everyone!

 

'Twas the night before Clips-mas, in the Grand Canyon State

And the Suns had just finished a cruel winter slate.

December'd been tough, with losses a-plenty,

Delaying their dreams of win number twenty.

loss to the Cavs Back to back losses had left them all crabby,

Though 18 and 10 11 wasn't too shabby.

And 'Mare in his goggles and Nash in his tuque,

Wondered if their hot start had been just a fluke.

Then there on the schedule, served on a platter

Were the poor hapless Clippers, their record a-tatter.

Star-divide

Away to the others flew ageless Steve Nash

To brighten their spirits with news of this clash!

Don Sterling's a racist and a slumlord to boot,

With an owner like that, hope never takes root.

But in the off season, hope did appear:

An Okie named Blake, presumed Rook of the Year!

But alas poor young Griffin, he broke his patella

Cuz the Clips are the Clips: Sorry, young fella.

But back to the Suns where Coach Gentry was thrilled

He whistled and shouted and thusly he trilled:

"Now, J-Rich! now, Channing! now Jared and Steve Nash!

And, Grant Hill!  And Goran!  And you, Max Contract!

These Clips, they can't stop us so when you get the ball...

Just bomb away!  Bomb away!  Bomb away all!"

At this time last year it was Coach Terry and Shaq

And under those two, the scoring punch did lack

But now it's a new game; by new I mean old

With running and gunning till the shooters get cold.

Steve Nash is a-passing at an MVP pace

And if no one's open, he'll nail a shot in your face.

Amare's bum eyeball ain't affecting his shot

He can sure put it in, but he jump-shoots a lot.

Grant Hill is still a baller, from his fade to his kicks;

These youngsters he's schooling with his veteran tricks.

J-Rich comes to play, but his shot's been lacking

But even when bricking, he just won't stop attacking.

And Frye!  How he drain 3s!  How he runs up the court!

If only in the paint, he could hold down the fort.

Off the old bench, it was Leandro and Lou

But now those DEEP Suns have a gosh-darn wrecking crew!

The strides by young Goran need their own song

His new nickname is "Frosty," "Tragic" is long gone.

Barbosa's been ailing, but the Blur's coming back

With blow-bys and goat sounds in his Santa's sack.

And Jared can play when he's not all a-Twitter

But Taylor and Robin? Still the runts of their litters.

So thank goodness for Lou, and his pogo legs

Cuz Jarron and Tucker's +/- is negs.

Steve Kerr's got a winner; Sarver's saving bucks,

But those off-season moves: shrewd skill or dumb luck?

The Planet Orange faithful give not a care,

Winning's what counts and these Suns do it with flair.

Phoenicians, rejoice!  When the Clippers come to town,

It's all but assured that they're gonna go down.

Victory will be ours, so tune in this Friday night,

Merry Christmas to all! (It's not on TNT, right?)

Comment 14 comments  |  15 recs  | 

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If only there were

a quadruple Rec score

Another instant holiday classic from Mike!!!

Blogging Suns Basketball . twitter: @phoenixstan

by Seth Pollack on Dec 23, 2009 11:40 AM MST reply actions  

Seriously,

Pure genius!

Bright Side of the Sun, where Suns basketball never looked so good.

by Trevor Paxton on Dec 24, 2009 7:33 PM MST up reply actions  

Awesome

Rec’d

Steve Nash plays D!!

by phxsuns on Dec 23, 2009 11:52 AM MST reply actions  

Fab

Great work Sir….again

by nash-n-burn on Dec 23, 2009 11:59 AM MST reply actions  

I love it, man

I wish I could rec it +10 times. Thanks for making my day.

"Basketball doesn't build character. It reveals it"

by PanamaSun on Dec 23, 2009 1:01 PM MST reply actions  

Great Stuff Mike

They say "don't swim with the sharks", but I'm faster than sharks so it's not a big deal...

by Eutychus on Dec 23, 2009 1:24 PM MST reply actions  

This is...

….beyond BRILLIANT!! Love it!

by Silkster on Dec 23, 2009 2:11 PM MST reply actions  

This is fantastic

BSoTS where great humor meets great writing.

by azmanian_devil on Dec 23, 2009 5:55 PM MST reply actions  

Haha Awesome!

Finally got around to reading it.. I was definitely LOLing a lot reading. Nice.

by brian13 on Dec 25, 2009 12:24 PM MST reply actions  

Applause!!!!

Very Well Done! Thank you i enjoyed that very much!

My First post! GO SUNS!

by steverliu on Dec 25, 2009 9:20 PM MST reply actions  

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