Cancelled - Lakers @ Suns b/c "outcome too obvious"
by BSotS NBA Correspondent on Feb 27, 2009 12:12 PM MST
24 comments
In a bold move to reinvigorate the NBA in these tough economic times, David Stern has moved to cancel Sunday's Suns game against the Lakers. Instead, ABC will replay re-runs of the Bachelor.
"The outcome was just too obvious," said NBA power broker David Stern, "We expect Lakers fans to say that the Suns have no chance, but when we also saw Suns fans say the same thing, we knew it to be true."
Besides exciting re-runs of the Bachelor, true fans can watch the ESPN/Accuscore's 10,000 simulations of the game on NBA League Pass.
"The simulations can actually be more exciting than the real game, because it happens faster and we load up fewer commercials." said one technician, who goes by the nickname "Scooby".
"And for Suns fans, they can watch the 3 games of the 10,000 where the Suns actually win." Scooby said. "Those games were actually a programming glitch, since we all know that the Suns have no chance of winning on Sunday."
The NBA Players Union is upset because the players will not be paid for not playing in Sunday's game.
"NBA 2K9 cannot be made without the players. ESPN's Accuscore cannot be generated without the players playing the game. There's talk that next season will be completely simulated. They'll want to steal our DNA and not pay us at all." said Derek Fisher, who's daughter has never been heard of again, since he got out of Utah and moved back to LA.
Critics argue that the Suns imploding season has "more drama" than Jason ditching Melissa for Molly. However, everyone agrees that Jillian was more woman than Jason could handle.
Our contacts at Stern's office reported his grinchly glee at having finally broken the optimism of Suns fans after 41 years of stealing their hopes, dreams and joys.
"Finally!" he sighed with satisfaction.
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Ha!
Thanks for making me laugh, I needed that today. Now I’ll go back to the dark corner and weep.
"Basketball doesn't build character. It reveals it"
by PanamaSun on Feb 27, 2009 12:34 PM MST reply actions 0 recs
A dark corner
In the bright side of the sun blog? nooooooooo wayyyyy!
" I'm going to root for the Suns when they are winning or losing, but when losing I will point and blame the failing economy on the Referees."- Me.
by antiw0rm on Feb 27, 2009 12:43 PM MST up reply actions 0 recs
At least
We are have realistic people here. I wonder if the Suns have a real problem on nationally televised games. Or if it has to do with the fact those games are against good teams?
" I'm going to root for the Suns when they are winning or losing, but when losing I will point and blame the failing economy on the Referees."- Me.
by antiw0rm on Feb 27, 2009 12:45 PM MST up reply actions 0 recs
Actually, sun spots appear black against the much hotter normal temperature of the sun.
Take care of the little things, and the big things will take care of themselves.
by SunDolphin on Feb 27, 2009 5:06 PM MST up reply actions 0 recs
End it now please
Can we just get to the offseason and draft and start this team again by scratch? Please?
"Yeah I could have been king, but maybe I already am king. Hail to the king baby." Ash from Army of Darkness
by Turambar on Feb 27, 2009 1:15 PM MST reply actions 0 recs
Since Amar'e is out
no more Gorilla games. We might want to bring our monkey game on Sunday.
"Basketball doesn't build character. It reveals it"
by PanamaSun on Feb 27, 2009 2:13 PM MST reply actions 0 recs
+1
Bring out the poo throwing monkey…
by Gorilla Game on Feb 27, 2009 3:08 PM MST up reply actions 0 recs
No can do. It’ll only work if we’re playing 5 on 1 against Chris Griffin.
Take care of the little things, and the big things will take care of themselves.
by SunDolphin on Feb 27, 2009 5:07 PM MST up reply actions 0 recs
I can't believe it
We actully brought our Gorilla game today! YAY!
"Basketball doesn't build character. It reveals it"
by PanamaSun on Mar 1, 2009 6:54 PM MST up reply actions 0 recs
LOL
Very clever indeed. I say we rest Nash and Shaq for the rest of the season in an all-out bid to finish 32-50 and get a decent draft pick. At least that would give us something to cheer for .
But the Sarver would just trade it to the Knicks for cash considerations.
April 29, 2008 Total Eclipse of the Sun. Is the sky falling?
by Hawk42 on Feb 27, 2009 2:40 PM MST reply actions 0 recs
Just play out the season.
Try to make playoffs no matter what. We make it great, then no different from the past 5 years. We dont make it then hey we tried. The key here is we have to play the bench. I think we can all agree that the window has been shut and nothing huge will happen with the franchise for at least 2 seasons. At least we can develop some of bench, Flopez, Dragon and Tucker. Let those guys play some good time not scrub time so they are not so gereen next year. Here is a concept we are not used to. Phoenix suns, where developing players happens.
by Gorilla Game on Feb 27, 2009 3:07 PM MST reply actions 0 recs
Developing Players
That’s an interesting concept. The best “new” player we got seems to be Lightning Lou Amundson lol not even one of our hyped draft picks. I think Flopez, Dragic and Tucker can play but they need court time and lots of it to get to become solid veterans. And time… Tucker should be ready, he’s been though a lot.
by eagleheart on Feb 28, 2009 4:42 AM MST reply actions 0 recs
haha - this is why we play the games!
In Nash we trust - for better and for worse...
by ZonaFlash on Mar 1, 2009 6:44 PM MST reply actions 0 recs
Playing 5 minutes
Playing 5 minutes in garbage time, does not prepare a player for anything. You can’t get into a rhythm as a player if you just sub in for a quick couple minutes. Most the youngsters don’t even get in the game until like the last 2 minutes of the half. At that point, the coach has them in so they can’t hurt the team, but they also don’t learn anything because the game has slowed to a crawl with timeouts and playing the clock.
by eagleheart on Mar 2, 2009 2:52 AM MST reply actions 0 recs
Suns Win
By the way, this post was way off the Suns showed some fY&^$#king spirit finally and took out the L*kers. Played solid ball for the whole game, except for a 3rd quarter Bryant eruption, they pretty much dominated the game.
by eagleheart on Mar 2, 2009 2:53 AM MST reply actions 0 recs
I think this post was obviously sarcastic.
I think it also pointed out that giving into despair and hopelessness was to play into David Stern’s evil plot to steal christmas! =)
In Nash we trust - for better and for worse...
by ZonaFlash on Mar 2, 2009 9:36 AM MST up reply actions 0 recs
Sarcasm? What?
But it’s by an “NBA Correspondent.” Just the facts and all that jazz, right?
by Mike Lisboa on Mar 2, 2009 10:13 AM MST up reply actions 0 recs
Just the facts, ma'am.
Our staff upholds the highest standards for truth, justice and the American Way in journalism. We’ve discovered this task isn’t very hard, so we have lots of free time.
by BSotS NBA Correspondent on Mar 2, 2009 11:11 AM MST up reply actions 0 recs
Heh, this was great. Thanks for the laugh.
Straight from the No-Stat Zone to your computer!
Dunkin' Cheerleaders
by LatinD on Mar 8, 2009 4:15 PM MDT reply actions 0 recs
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