First off, I am a two time NBA champion and my dad is NBA legend Bill Walton. I used to played for the University of Arizona, so I am familiar with this fantastic city. My nickname, for all of those who haven't heard, is SwagBro and I have already developed a great relationship with Shannon Brown. Therefore, you know that fans can be comfortable knowing that I will be a seamless fit. Now, If those astute accomplishments are not enough to convince you of my value, then I should tell you that I am the best in the business when it comes down to bench warming. At only 6 million dollars a year, I will absolutely ensure that your bench its the warmest and most comfortable to sit on in the entire league. Kobe proved that he could win without Shaq, but without me to keep the bench lukewarm, the way he absolutely loves it, Kobe was eliminated in the second round again.
I am here to convince fans of the Phoenix Suns that I am the right player for this franchise! Hit the jump to find out more.
Championship experience and a veteran leadership is necessary for every team and with my special set of skills, I will be able to help Beasley grow and develop into the budding, get it, superstar he is meant to be. I'm also not that bad at basketball either and if you don't believe me, here is my basketball reference page. I should warn you, however, that playing alongside Kobe Bryant is like playing with a black hole; all of my statistics are deflated as a result. This is why my averages are so pedestrian. My time in Cleveland has been very uncomfortable, because no one seems to appreciate my unique abilities, and the Suns are a franchise known for squeezing every last bit of talent out of its players. If you take a look at my college statistics you can clearly see that I have tremendous potential to continue to expand my game.
My most valuable asset aside from basketball is my lifetime supply of cannabis that my dad awarded me for getting drafted. Although, my dad won't even look at me or call me his son, I know he is very proud of me and my accomplishments and if you simply cannot turn down the son of a Hall of Famer. Who needs Chandler Parsons when you can have Luke Freaking Walton you lucky SOBs.Did I mention that Mr. Babby was my former agent as well? Now you know my incredible value to this team, I'll be waiting for your call.