Bright Side Of The Sun: An SB Nation Community

Navigation: Jump to content areas:


Pro Quality. Fan Perspective.
Around SBN: The Record of Wrongs: Vanderbilt Commodores

Can This Marriage be Saved?

[Editor's Note: I love this! You guys are doing all the work for me this week. Thanks a bunch, JSun for maybe the best take on this I've seen so far.]

The "bad marriage" from Trix quote really got to me. I posted a bit of a comment on this over the Clockwork Orange blog. In my experience, the person saying, "It's a bad marriage and we just need to move on" is usually the person who has given up trying.

Now, that person may have had every reason to give up trying ... or, maybe that person is just too immature. For purposes of this discussion, I don't care if Marion had good reasons or bad reasons. The question now becomes what do you do with that person.

I'm going to assume that Marion is the person who is frustrated and giving up but the Suns organization is the person that is still trying to work on it. The Suns may be the abusive husband and Marion is right in giving up. Or, the Suns may be the spouse that doesn't give the other spouse enough attention; but, when the non-attentive spouse mends his/her ways, the other is already "done with it." The third option in my over-generalization is that Matrix is a spoiled brat and his "spouse" has been enabling his co-dependant personality.

Those are sort of the range of possibilities, and I'm sure that the reality lies somewhere in there -- probably with a little bit of truth to every scenario, but much more complicated.

Reports are that the Suns are not giving up on Marion -- at least not yet. He'll show up to camp because he's a pro and he's the type of guy who still bends over to pick up change on the ground. He also professes to love his teammates who also "love" him back in that macho-guy kind of way. His "beef" is with management, but who really loves his/her boss? So, he'll be there for the team.

Can it be fixed? Can it be solved? I don't know, but there is only one way to solve it. The organization (and the fans who rightfully feel they've been betrayed) need to be the "bigger man" -- i.e., let's welcome back our Prodigal Son with open arms and kill the fatted calf (I wonder if I can get a refund on my new Suns-Odom jersey). That's the only way we can possibly fix this. Maybe he'll come around, maybe he won't. Who knows.

The only other option is to kick him in the nuts and tell him to go to Hell.

It's a viable option, don't get me wrong. But it won't fix the situation.

I know, I know, "How many times do we have to tell the guy he's appreciated?" I have no delusions: the Prodigal Son approach may not fix a damn thing. It might even make things worse. But, it's the only other option besides a swift kick to the nuts. Tip-toeing around the issue will get the Suns nowhere.

Maybe he really just wants an extension but the money is not the sticking point? Would he be willing to tack on three years at $15M a year and retire a Sun? I'd still like to see that. Maybe that can happen. Can you imagine the "love-fest" that would go on if something like that happened? Sugar would be oozing out of the walls of USAC and causing vehicles on the roads downtown to lose traction and spin uncontrolably into one another.

In sum, as I see it, you either have to kick him in the nuts and send him on his way or welcome him back. If you don't work on it, you'll never know. The question is whether you're willing to work on it.

0 recs  |  Comment 13 comments

Story-email Email Printer Print

Comments

Display:

Compelling analogy
"I am not a role model. A million guys can dunk a basketball in jail, should they be role models?" - Charles Barkley

by kcbrett5 on Sep 27, 2007 11:22 AM MDT reply actions   0 recs

I shouldn't be writing about this
"The third option in my over-generalization is that Matrix is a spoiled brat and his "spouse" has been enabling his co-dependant personality."

Although "co-dependent" would be an inaccurate description of Marion's personality, I do think you made a hit with the enabling.

The Suns have done nothing to discourage Marion's behavior or the factors that lead to his displeasure every year.  It's almost as if trhey WANT him to demand a trade so that the fans won't revolt against the new ownership.  This is a lesson well-learned from the Diamondbacks and Gonzo.

It's better to piss off an employee, no matter how "valuable" he is to the franchise.  Just don't piss off the people paying to see the franchise play.  

At the same time, maybe this is what the fans needed, as well.  We love Shawn (if I may speak for every Suns fan on the planet...Planet Orange...I gag).  We don't like to take sides because, throughout its history, the Suns organization has been pretty good to its fans (4th best reguar season record in NBA history).  

We can usually forgive any disgruntled player for leaving, unless his name is Charles Barkley, Sam Cassell, or Robert Horry.  But those guys did something special upon leaving - they slammed our franchise.  So as long as Shawn continues to say the right things (ie, I love the fans, I love the team, I want to retire a Sun), we can be upset with him for a while.  But we all know that we will welcome him back at any time for any price (below what he is already making).

The way things are working it, I don't see a reason why any of us can really be upset with either side.  This may very well be a case of the husband not understanding the wife, and the wife staying a couple extra years for the kids.

Thanks for the linkage, yo.

Yes, I am the smartest pesron in the room.

by Phan X on Sep 27, 2007 1:54 PM MDT reply actions   0 recs

I Beg to Differ
I'm no head-doctor guy, but my understanding of "co-dependent" (at least in the vernacular) is that it's a person that perpetuates his problem by the stuff the other gal is feeding him.  A wife gets beaten, but can't stand living without the husband because her self-esteem is now so low that she cannot see herself with another man.  By sticking around, she enables her husband to do more of the same.

That might not be the best definition, but it's mine and it's what I meant to say.

I thought everyone had forgiven the Chuckster until he got drunk and became a TNT announcer?  We can learn to love him again, can't we?  And how can you take him seriously when all he talks about is the need to play tough defense?  That's almost as funny as when EJ and Chambers say the same thing.

Mmmmm ... Guinness

by JSun on Sep 27, 2007 2:08 PM MDT up reply actions   0 recs

oops
The below reply was meant to be here.  Forgot to click "reply to this".
Yes, I am the smartest pesron in the room.

by Phan X on Sep 27, 2007 2:24 PM MDT up reply actions   0 recs

Because it's Chuck
I was cool with Chuck until he started talking smack about Jerry Colangelo.  It really took Game 4 for the forgiveness (lotsa "for" sounds there) really to begin.

I got what you mean now.  It's just that, as far as I know, codependents are people that latch onto other people's problems for the benefit of their own self-esteem.  So if Marion stays to help "fix" the Suns, then it's codependent.  

(Sorry to have been nitpicky.  It's a long story, but words and definitions always have to match for me.  If not, then I end up not being able to read certain things.  Some weird, complex reading disorder.  Long LONG story.)

Yes, I am the smartest pesron in the room.

by Phan X on Sep 27, 2007 2:23 PM MDT reply actions   0 recs

Adiós Shawn
This is a situation that has been engineered by Sarver to get rid of payroll.  He wouldn't give Johnson $50 mil for 7 years, and he dumped Thomas and Jones and sold five first round picks in the past three years to make a buck.  It was his intention to pi$$ of Marion so the fans would be mad at Marion instead of Sarver.  We all fell for it and now Sarver can continue to dismantle the Suns for profit.  This is not the first time a corporate raider has sold off a flourishing company to make a buck.  Want to bet he sells the Atlanta pick next year.  If Atlanta gets a lottery pick, it will be worth a bundle.

by OneSunsFan on Sep 27, 2007 2:48 PM MDT reply actions   0 recs

Co-Dependence and Conspiracy Theories
Here's a link to an article about co-dependence:

http://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/features/signs-of-a-codependent-relationship

It was several pages long and I don't like to read past the introductory synopsis because I have ADHD and MTV has ruined my attention span.  So, anyway.  I was kinda right, but not really.  

Sarver is not "dismantling" this team to make a buck.  Yes, the stock of one (not all) of his companies is down, but make no mistake about it, Monterey is still making it hand-over-fist; it's just that there are a few less hands grabbing it.  I didn't like the KT move, I've ridiculed the moves made since then (right on this site) and I still maintain we were lied to when we were told that the only off-season moves the Suns would make would be to improve the team.  The Suns are weaker for Thomas leaving (although he could've opted-out and negotiated a lower contract), but Junior leaving was nothing short of a god-send and we replaced him with Grant Hill.

Look, though, two years ago the Suns went 6 games in the WCF with Diaw at the 5.  The Spurs haven't repeated as champs.  Who else is there?

I had lunch with my buddy who's going to Las Vegas tonight.  I gave him $10 to put down on the Suns to win it all this season.  I'll be the guy in the victory parade downtown waiving my winning ticket.

Mmmmm ... Guinness

by JSun on Sep 27, 2007 3:12 PM MDT reply actions   0 recs

Too late?
Only $10?

Perhaps the most telling line in your link, JSun, is this:

~People often get addicted to hope: The hope that the person will change~

Who's hoping for what, I wonder? Is Marion hoping that whomever he's got a beef with will change? Are the powers-that-be hoping that Marion will play Prodigal Son and come back to the fold? Or is it just plain too late for any of that? The When Harry Met Sally Effect...the "trade me" thing is already out there and can't be taken back?

Whatever the case, I hate distractions like this on my sports teams, and no matter what, it's a distraction.

by Sunny on Sep 27, 2007 3:35 PM MDT up reply actions   0 recs

Only $10?
I only had ten bucks left in my pocket after my 3 Guinness power-networking lunch.  You think I'm made of money?

Thanks for reading the article in the link.  Since I didn't read it (MTV strikes again), it's nice to have someone telling me what it says.  It is a distraction, but one we've been living with for some time.  Eh?

Mmmmm ... Guinness

by JSun on Sep 27, 2007 3:43 PM MDT up reply actions   0 recs

Distractions
With $10, you coulda bought one more Guinness.

Maybe it's time to get rid of the distraction. Teams who play with distractions of this magnitude often go far but rarely win it all...sort of like the Suns.

"This marriage" can be saved. The question isn't whether or not both the Suns and Marion are willing to work on it. The question is, is it worth it? Will it bring the currently-elusive championship?

That article was pretty interesting. You really need to work on that MTV'd attention span...even if it IS a ruse.

by Sunny on Sep 27, 2007 4:12 PM MDT up reply actions   0 recs

HA!
I see what happened.  We were looking at it from opposite sides.

We cool.

Yes, I am the smartest pesron in the room.

by Phan X on Sep 27, 2007 6:42 PM MDT up reply actions   0 recs

My first take on this whole thing
Marion is my second fav Sun, only behind Raja Bell. I think that he is a flat out great player. He can do nearly anything in the court. But it's not all about him. I mean, it would be worse for us to lose Stat and Nash right now, because these two are arguably the the 'center' of our coach's strategy. And also, if he needs anything bigger than he gets now, if being a big part of the best team in the league isn't enough, hell, if being a part of this franchise history isn't what he wants, then screw him. He can go anywhere for all I care. I think we should trade his ass for, say, Jason Richardson, or a kind of player like this.

Again, maybe there's something else we don't know. But it doesn't look like that. Maybe he just isn't happy in Phoenix.

Walk on, walk on With hope in your heart And you'll never walk alone You'll never walk alone

by Nobs on Sep 27, 2007 3:42 PM MDT reply actions   0 recs

Matrix
Well I hope I get to see Marion in training camp.  I just got my tickets for the Tucson scrimmage today!!!

by whatisboxhappening on Sep 27, 2007 6:04 PM MDT reply actions   0 recs

Comments For This Post Are Closed


User Tools

Welcome to the SB Nation blog devoted to all things Phoenix Suns.
Start posting about the Suns »

Join SB Nation and dive into communities focused on all your favorite teams.

FanPosts

Community blog posts and discussion.

Recommended FanPosts

New_picture__1__small
The Amare Shift - Phoenix Fandom and the Love-Hate Relationship
New_picture__1__small
The Dragic Report: A Mid-Season Evaluation

Recent FanPosts

Small
Trade or not to Trade that is the question.
Small
Suns to offer Stoudemire Contract Extension by end of the week
190518335osmpfk_ph_1__small
Ray Allen trade to Phoenix?
Small
THE WRONG WAY
Small
Another possible trade!
Small
My Suns-Sixers Trade Idea
Hahahame_small
Possible Trade, what do you think?
Small
Potential hiccups in Philly-Suns negotiations
Small
How would Andre Iguodala fit with the Phoenix Suns?
Small
Star players, egos, & salaries.

+ New FanPost All FanPosts >

RSS Feeds

Bright Side Of The Sun Feeds


Editor in Chief

Sethpo_small Seth Pollack

Photo Editor

P1000778_small Wil Cantrell

Photo_1_small Max Simbron

Staff Writer

Family_guy_1_small PanamaSun

Me_small iamtrevorpaxton

Amare_small watdogg10