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Ever since he retired happily as a Phoenix Sun in 2012*, Steve Nash been busy as a filmmaker, most recently producing the Rookie-Vet series starring Tyson Chandler and Devin Booker .
And even before then, his production company Meathawk was producing his own promotional spots for Vitamin Water (he’s faster than sharks, y’know) and Nike as well an ESPN 30 for 30 special about Canadian amputee and distance runner Terry Fox. But everyone has to start somewhere. And for Steve Nash, that was making stars out of his teammates off the court as well as on it with this series of simply shot short films.
Presented for your viewing pleasure in (what I think is) chronological order are the complete Phoenix Suns short films of Steve Nash.
Clean Hands
Nash chose Phoenix Suns first round draft pick and subsequent D-League journeyman (thanks, Steve Kerr!) Alando Tucker as his first leading man. He sends the apparent germophobe into a party armed with some hand sanitizer and warning about H1N1. Not quite hilarity ensues.
The Player
OK, this one isn’t Suns-related. Nash travels to Europe to “pwn” a series of international superstars in silly stealth mode. I had to stop watching it about halfway through when someone got fed up and checked/tackled Nash to the ground. TOO SOON.
Toilet Humour
In perhaps the worst assist he ever gave to Amare Stoudemire, Nash made Amare his co-star in this quickie. Amare confronts Nash about peeing on a toilet seat and then Nash mumbles something about a “fire hose”. Probably the weakest of the Meathawk filmography.
All Night Long
Scorsese and DeNiro.
Herzog and Kinski.
Burton and Depp.
Nash and Barbosa.
Steve Nash found his ultimate muse in the Brazilian Blur. In their first collab, Leandro Barbosa gets some lyrical lessons on Lionel Ritchie from his teammates and leads them in a rousing (only in the sense that everyone is sleeping at the start of the video) rendition of “All Night Long.” Come for camaraderie. Stay for the GOAT sounds.
Vote for Me
Nash campaigns for the 2010 NBA All-Star game with a selection of his career lowlights. [Kobe Bryant trigger warning.]
Balls Talk
In which Nash and his junk heap all sorts of abuse on Robin Lopez. A little funnier than Toilet Humour but only because Nash is great villain.
Avatar
OK, I cheated as this was technically the second-to-last short Nash made in Phoenix, but it was worth it. Leandro Barbosa turns in a towering performance as one of the blue-hued Na’vi from James Cameron’s Avatar. It’s easily the best of the Nash shorts and makes me very happy that Barbosa is a Sun again.
* He retired as a Sun at the end of the 2012 season. I don’t care what anyone else says on the matter.