Goodnight Manu: A Eulogy For The Suns’ Rival Spurs

Unlike in comic books and the subsequent movies based off them, in sports, the heroes and villains don’t live on in perpetuity. Eventually they retire and move on. Sometimes, rivalries remain, but the new people who pick up the mantle are never quite the same as the originals.

On Monday, the last on-court piece of the great 2000s Suns-Spurs rivalry hung it up when the “Bat Man,” Manu Ginobili, called it quits.

I’d love to sit here and say glowing things about Manu, what he stood for and what the Spurs represented, but I just can’t. As part of the Suns fraternity, or phraternity if you prefer, forgiving and forgetting isn’t exactly our strong suit. I’m looking at you, John Paxson.

While some may lament that Manu’s retirement marks the end of one of the last great “homegrown” dynasties in the NBA, we in Phoenix can’t help but feel a sense of relief. The disturbance in the force that was the Spurs is no more.

But what do we do with the feelings that still remain? Those dark memories that have intertwined in our brains like some black and silver spider web that we can’t shake free of? You write a eulogy of sorts. A final purge of what should have been the greatest era in Suns basketball that instead turned into one of the few things outside of the Alamo and Riverwalk the city of San Antonio has to celebrate.

While I’d love to have penned a brilliantly crafted call to arms, a reminder to Suns fans why we are passionate about the purple and orange and hold a passionate distaste for all things Spurs, I couldn’t. That’s because I have an almost 2-year-old at home and couldn’t get “Goodnight Moon” out of my head. So here’s a eulogy to the Seven Seconds or Less Suns’ archrivals, set to the “tune” of that beloved children’s book.

In the great silver and black room

There were plenty of calls blown

And a bow tie-wearing buffoon

And championship banners of

Titles that were won thanks to a bunch of goons

And there was Pop, in his chair

And Duncan’s befuddled ref stare

And Ginobili

And Tony

and the Refs, full of baloney

And Timmy D

And his improbable 3

And Big Shot Bob

And his hipcheck who helped the Spurs rob

And plenty of nightmares that make Suns fans sob

Goodnight Room

Goodnight Bafoon

Goodnight Banners thanks to Goons

Goodnight Pop, in his chair

Goodnight Duncan’s befuddled ref stare

Goodnight Ginobli and Tony and damn refs full of baloney

Goodnight Timmy D and that infuriatingly improbable 3

Goodnight Bob and that evil hip check that did rob

Goodnight Memories that make Suns fans sob

Goodnight Manu

Goodnight Horry

Goodnight Timmy

Goodnight Tony

Goodnight fans who are phony

Goodnight Pop and his smirk and white hair

Goodnight Spurs, everywhere